When your brain registers happiness, it often sends a message to the muscles around your mouth to form a smile. But interestingly, it works both ways. Researchers have shown that forcing yourself to smile can make your brain feel happier. In humans, our cause and effect circuitry often works in both directions.

Another example is music. If you hear a new song at about the same time you're falling in love, that song can later become a trigger for your emotions. Your feelings of being in love probably helped the song sound better than normal when you first heard it, and years later the song can summon those same feelings in you.

There are lots of ways we can take advantage of these little triggers in our lives. My favorite example is that if I don't feel like exercising, I can often change that feeling simply by putting on my workout clothes and running shoes. My brain associates the feel-good chemistry of sports and exercise with the physical sensation that my athletic shoes have on my feet.

This leads me to today's topic: The Curiosity Seduction Hypothesis. We know that when two people are attracted they become intensely curious about the life and happenings of the other. In fact, the best way to know if someone has romantic interest in you is by paying attention to the questions that person asks. If someone asks you only a few typical questions, it's probably just polite conversation and nothing more. But if the curiosity starts extending to deeper questions, and more of them, that's a "tell" that something else is happening.

My hypothesis is that you can induce romantic or sexual interest in another person by exhibiting curiosity, even if the curiosity is faked. Since we know romantic interest generates curiosity, I would expect it to work in reverse as well. Pretending to be curious about the details of another person's feelings should cause that person to automatically form a positive feeling about you, including perhaps feelings of lust and romance.

Obviously this only works if the two people involved have some potential for chemistry in the first place. I wouldn't worry about falling in love with a banker who asks for your mother's maiden name to verify your password.

Do me a favor and try this method over the weekend to seduce someone new or to generate some action with your existing partner. If it doesn't work, the worst that can happen is that you will appear to be an interested and caring conversationalist.

If you report back on Monday that the technique worked, you will have earned your Moist Robot Reprogramming Certification, Level 1.
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Jul 6, 2012
"My hypothesis is that you can induce romantic or sexual interest in another person by exhibiting curiosity, even if the curiosity is faked."

Not just romantic or sexual, I think it works with any kind of emotion. I think I've seen many a friend lose themselves over manipulative girls who grasped that lesson very early in life. :)
Jul 6, 2012
I'm not sure I quite understand the hypothesis. If you act curious about someone, you are indicating you are interested in the other person, which, in most cases where 'seduction' takes place, is already clear just by the fact that you are talking to them. The real question is how to make the other person curious about YOU (and thereby potentially generate romantic feelings). If you just talk about yourself as if they asked, you're going to look like a self-absorbed d-bag. Perhaps a better technique is to make leading statements which make them want to ask more questions. For example, end a story with "and that was the second craziest thing I've ever done." If they are even slightly interested in you, they will of course want to ask what the most crazy thing you've ever done was.
+25 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 6, 2012
"The Curiosity Seduction Hypothesis"

This sounds like the title of an episode of The Big Bang Theory.
+3 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 6, 2012
That's dating/sales/socializing 101 - show interest by asking lots of questions.
+42 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 6, 2012
I'm not sure, but I think this counts:

I popped out of my office, went upstairs and asked my wife a few questions about how her day was going. My wife, who sees through me and has little tolerance for any bullsh*t, looked at her watch and said, "I have 15 minutes."
Jul 6, 2012
You understand that this is how singles bars have worked for many years!
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