Jul 31, 2009 General Nonsense |
As regular readers know, I believe that the most likely explanation for our existence is that we're holographic computer simulations created by humans who came before us. And we don't appear to be randomized. It seems as if there are clear themes to every life, as if we are programmed that way.

For example, one of my themes is that most of my technology is defective. Here's a sample just from today:

Fax machine receives but doesn't send

DVD drive on computer doesn't recognize discs

DVD player puts white spots on movies

DVR freezes and locks on every recording

Movie editing software I just purchased is too slow to use

Fedex website is unfathomable

TV has a bad color wheel

Postal meter needs a battery

Computer backup (new) slows my system to a crawl all day

Wireless router doesn't work

Computer keeps locking up

Can't get rid of an ad that keeps popping up on new laptop

Old laptop stopped working months ago

Blackberry won't sync with my Outlook address book

Car has a warning light on the dashboard that the dealer can't turn off
This blog software doesn't let me do numbered lists

It has always been this way for me. It's a theme. And speaking of themes, check out the Dilbert themes for igoogle


Look how I cleverly worked that in. Anyway, my point today is that you can often predict the future from themes. If you had done a poll two months ago and asked people to predict how Michael Jackson would die, I think many of you would have nailed it.

If a young Kennedy someday runs for president again, I think we all know how that will end too. The only mystery is whether it will happen by gunfire or in some sort of flying, floating, or roadway mishap. And I will go out on a limb and predict there would be rumors of infidelity.

Another theme is financial bubbles. While there are no obvious bubble candidates on the horizon, I predict there will be another one soon. That's simply a theme.

You can try this at home. Pick a theme and make a prediction of the future. I will add another prediction that some of you will complain about the crass commercialism in this post.

Rank Up Rank Down Votes:  +4
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+3 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 31, 2009
Facebook/Twitter is my prediction for the next bubble...social media is getting so overblown and with corporations using it as a marketing tool, it is only a matter of time before it is over.
+2 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 31, 2009
Sounds like you need your own BOFH or at least a PFY (pimply-faced youth) to deal with your crap so you can get work done.
Jul 31, 2009
That defective technology theme just reared it's head again - here's the link I wanted to !$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$ it works this time)
Jul 31, 2009

the next bubble is the Chinese economy/stock !$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*!$%*! guess is that India won't be too far behind.

So if you've invested in anything to do with Chinese stocks, property, startups etc, my advice is to sell up now.

You're welcome.
Jul 31, 2009
Quality control sucks. The general public are now beta testers!
Many items (mainly electronics) are cheaper to replace than repair - is there a hidden meaning there.
If you build something that wil be obsolete in a few years, while waste the extra time and effort to build a quality item.
(I can buy a new color laser printer, for less money than it costs to replace the toner cartridges that came with the initial purchase)
It is better to have unemployed people in the US, and have telephone support provided from India (where you can barely understand the responses)
Profit over people.
What will stop this developing trend?
0 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 31, 2009
You are chalking most of those issues to holographs and themes, but a simpler solution might be to move away from Microsoft Windows ;-)
Jul 31, 2009
I know this will sound incredibly like I was an Apple evangelist, but still: have you ever considered using a Mac and an iPhone? Try it, you'll love it. It just works.

[I have owned several Macs. They were all lemons. -- Scott]
Jul 31, 2009
Today's Technology is just another offshoot of the greedy immoral capitalist theme. Just gigabucks looking for an ap to cash in on. There is no pride of design, workmanship and support, just hit the market window with a piece of crap looking for the quick buck and move on. Nobody cares to understand their customers, just the requirement to maximize the short term ROI regardless of the future ramifications.
+2 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 31, 2009
Damn crass commercialism.

My prediction for MJs death would have been due to complications from one Rhinoplasty too many. Oh yeah, crap, that WAS it.

The next theme I predict is religion. Every couple thousand years there is a paradigm shift. From the polytheistic Egyptians, to the also polytheistic Greeks and Romans, then comes the Monotheistics, Jews, Christians, Muslims. Next will be the rise of the non-theists, if Buddhism wasn't already old as dirt I would point to that as the next "big" religion. Somebody just needs to put a new twist on it, make it fresh, and the world will run with it. You just watch the next thousand years or so prove me right. OR, my personal favorite, Xenotheism. Scientology is trying even now to start this one. If they weren't complete nuts I would think these guys would be leading the charge.
Jul 31, 2009
Maybe your hologram is so powerful that all modern technology bends to your superior manufacture.
0 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 31, 2009
Here are three.

3-5 years years from now: We will stop enough pirates in the Gulf of Aden to dramatically decrease the attacks. They'll all be back a few years later as Somalia will still be a failed state that nobody wants to deal with. (plus dehr still be booty on dem dar seas)

10-15 years: Somewhere in the world we will help depose a dictator who isn't very friendly to us and replace him with somebody who is vastly more sympathetic to our international goals. The new guy will become a royal pain shortly there after.

20 years: A well respected Wall Street investment advisor will generate annual returns that most sane people would think are impossible to achieve. People will invest billions with him before the ponzi scheme collapses under its own weight. Everyone will pretend that they are shocked that the year after year 12% returns were fraudulent.
Jul 31, 2009
Tech: Flawed makers makng flawed tools
Kennedys: arrogance (open tpp through huge crowds, flying in the dark w/o adequate instrument knowledge, etc)
Bubbles: People like vesting all hope on one thing, couplethis with fads and ignorance and you get bubbles
+6 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 31, 2009
With all of those technical malfunctions, I now urge you to re-think your Cheapatopia series, where everything is coordinated by computers and the internet. I say the place nukes itself inside of 3 days.
Jul 31, 2009
I predict Scott will read DesCartes and figure out what he was saying.

And he will get a new TV. Color wheel? how 70s
Jul 31, 2009
My life goes like this: I plod along, doing normal every-day things like the person beside me, for perhaps 2-3 years at a time, then, all of a sudden, WHAM! everything changes and I have to completely re-adjust my life to something completely different. The change is usually one I'm not contemplating, but these whirlwinds have been happening at more or less regular intervals all my life (I'm now 30 and not delusional, if that's relevant).

Now, when I start wondering if I should make a change in my life, etc., I just stop myself, and wait for the unpredictable thing to happen. Last time, my father died, I unexpectedly moved to another city, took on another job and fell in love with the man I'm currently engaged to. There's a lull before the storm and I've been feeling it for a while now. Even my friends and family have been remarking that it must be getting close. It's not always something I want to happen but even still, I can't wait to see what it is this time. I feel like I need a change.
Jul 31, 2009
I think it is just a theme that technology doesn't work, period. Nothing works like it's supposed to or lasts as long as it should and nobody knows how to fix it when it breaks. We do everything as cheaply as possible for the fastest profit. We want it fast and cheap rather than good and that's what we get. And the people that are supposed to make sure things work and stay working are underpaid and undertrained or replaced by someone working remotely from India. Just the way the world works.
-1 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 31, 2009
It sounds like you just need to update all electronics.
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