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There is no type or household quantity of edible substance that you could leave my Lab alone with and expect any of it to be there when you return. I'd set the over/under at 3 minutes for a dozen sugar-coated donuts, and 5 minutes for a 1 kg jar of peanut butter (licked clean).
@ LSPMartin: You don't have a dog, do you? Because most dogs would try to eat the peanut. BTW, don't try to give a dog peanuts because there is a very good chance they will choke on them.
Also, I couldn't help but notice; of the half dozen or more comments I had in my inbox from Dilbert.com, most of them where from you. Are you trying to start another debate with me? Even though you claim to have won our last debate, do you secretly feel you lost?
Or is this a variation of Stockholm syndrome were you begin to empathize with your tormentor?
Oh, the irony! What makes this strip so good is what Dilbert thinks in the third pane. If Lalalakirby stole SA's joke, she just licked off the outer coating of the humour and missed the nutrient core (i.e. Dilbert's ability to accept existence, even when his food is only what a rat left over for him).