It was all Stan's fault. He should have paid more attention when the CEO of phone making company said - "You cannot hold your phone like that. You need to hold it this way."
Wait the CEO has cancer too...!
Cell phones emit non-ionizing radiation, at approximately the same frequency as any microwave oven. So, while it isn't like getting zapped by a cosmic ray, it is also not safe, since your body will absorb the energy quite efficiently. And then there's the inverse-square law, which says if you are half the distance from the antenna, the radiation will be 4 times greater. Cell phones are made to be touching the side of your head. That's in the near-field of the antenna!
For all those objecting the differences over kinds of radiation: remember this is a company that handle radiactive waste as paperweight souvenirs, they are perfectly capable and willing to do radiactive handsets.