Evil Rat -
in the UK you're not allowed to keep aspirin / paracetamol etc in the 1st aid box ' cos the first aider isn't allowed to issue drugs - but take a look in the receptionist's or senior secretary's desk drawer and you'll find them !
I'm missing Dogbert today's role :) I think today he is "Human resources advisor" :)) As every time his role is genial and the point makes deep sense :)