Steve Ballmer: Your bonuses this year will be based upon the following formula. 50 Percent will be the performance of Windows 8, 50 percent will be upon the performance of some guy in our marketing department that you've never meet. Since our customers find Windows 8 completely and utterly confusing. We're going to make you build a new monstrosity that we call Windows Blue, which will completely nullify all of your bonuses forever.
As a Fed, we didn't get bonuses based on sales, but rather on the 'prestige' of the project. If you worked on a 'maintenance' project you had no chance. No chance at all. But if you could hook up to a nice 'PC' project, for example (this when desk top computers were just becoming commonplace) you were all but guaranteed a bonus (or 'award' as they were called). To rub it in, the entire team would get awards. Even the 'Wally' member, and of course there were many of him. The two people that did 80% got the exact same award as the eight or nine that did the remaining 20%.
Very good Scott! And I agree with rxantos: given the stupid way management uses to calculate bonuses, Wally is the only one who's not an idiot.
In my company, "top performers" got whatever % as a bonus, and "bottom performers" got a lower %, with most workers being in between. Icalculated that (for my salary) the difference between working hard to be top performer and slacking off like a bottom performer was equivalent to one ticket to the movies per pay period... now, that's an incentive to work hard! Oh... did I mention that the company went down (surprise!), and the CEO retired on his ocean front property, complaining that the insurance premium on his yacht just went up.